Visitor's Question from a 31-40 year old Person
ok.. here is my situation. i am separated and i was friends with a married man, he has a awful marriage and we grew from friends to a lot more.. well his marriage to give you a little back ground.. they sleep in separate rooms, ride in separate cars.. been married for 17 years.. well they have two kids. well him and i got closer and closer he said he loved me and then he was so torn on what to do he just about lost his mind... well once he had decided he was going to move out to a apartment.. she threatened him and told him he would pay alimony and child support if he leaves.. well he feels stuck.. he got his heart right with God and now.. we are just friends.. he emails me daily but says he can't come here to see me as friends cause it's to hard for him and he is scared he would be weak.. but i know he loved me.. he is a great guy.. and nothing else will ever happen between us unless he does leave home.. he is worried he can 't survive and pay her alimony and child support plus his own bills too.. him and his wife haven't been intimate in 2 years.. he told her he dont love her but she still threatens him with the alimony plus child support if he leaves... so he is still there.. well i have heard that you are supposed to give a man space to realize what he is missing... what does it mean when he emails me daily but won't come here to see me cause of temptation.. granted that is mature and smart.. but my question is .. how long to i wait to see if he will miss me.. and if he don't care then why does he email me... he is a great guy just married the wrong woman.. i feel bad for him.. and i love him dearly.. but i don't understand the distance.... does he still care and will he be back.. the distance makes me feel like he don't care but then he does email me daily.. so i just want to know what to do.. if we remain friends that is great.. but i do honestly love him.. how will i know his real feelings how much time... until i know .. he is very private and to himself... a loner!! how long do i give him to realize and how to i help make him realize...
The first thing he should do is to see a lawyer and find out just how bad he would be hit financially if he left his wife.
Meanwhile, you have little choice but to hang loose and see what develops.
He seems to love you, but if he can't afford to leave his wife then that puts an end to it.
If he moved in with you, would that solve the financial problems?
Best of luck to you!
-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com