Big age difference

Visitor's Question from a 16-20 year old Male
OK I already wrote about this but wanted to add a few things. I`m 17 and I know this parts a little wierd but the woman I love is 27. We met online almost 2 years ago. At first we were just freinds. Then we found out we loved all the same things and had everything in common. A perfect match no matter what the subject. She sent me a pic, I wish I could of done the same but I don`t have a camera. Eventually I fell in love with her. I was 16 at the time. I didn`t tell her though because she was 10 years older so thought that might be a bit of a problem. Anyway, oneday when I was 16 and a half we were chatting on IM and she said I love you. Honestly I was very shocked that she said it because she`s so much older, but I managed to type I love you too. We were very good friends and her kids even said I was her b/f. Some couple of months ago I asked her if she wanted to be my g/f and she said ok. The thing is now I`m a little unsure if she really meant any of it. She still says I love you too when I tell her I love her, but just recently she met someone else online (about a week ago). He has already come to visit her, had sex with her, and she is going to his house in KY to stay she says. I think they might even wind up getting married. I`m not exactly thrilled with this, because I love her and want to be the one shes with. So I`m both mad at this new guy and sad at the same time. I don`t know that he really likes her for her or just for her looks because she is a very beautifull woman, and he`s only know her for a week online and less then 24 hours in person. I love her more then everyone and every thing, and think I want to spend the rest of my life with her. But I also want her to be happy and I can`t force her to like me instead. PLEASE HELP! What do you thinks the best thing to do? I love her and would hate to lose her. I would love to be more then just friends with her, but I want her to be happy too, and realize I can`t force her to like me more. She knows I love her. I just want to know if she still feels the same way or if she ever did. I don`t know what I`d ever do without her. Shes the only woman I`ve ever loved. She says she doesn`t know whats going to happen, and that he hasn`t asked her to marry him yet. But he had sex with her after knowing her for only a week so I wouldn`t be surprised if he asks her to marry him too. Is there any way I can find out talking to her about it on IM if he really likes her or not? Any way I can tell if she really does or did like me? How about him? Any way I can tell if she really does love him? Any advice would be great. Before she met him in person I told her I bet he`s probally just a little midgit that lives with his mom and I turned out to be 100% right. Maybe I am right again about him not being as good as she may think. She says he`s good, but that doesn`t mean it`ll be the same in a week, a month, or even a year. Is there anything I can do to maybe convince her he`s not so great so I still have a chance? I don`t know what I`d ever do without her. She`s the best thing thats ever happened to me. I haven`t cried since I was just a little kid in elementry school, but when I found all this out I cried for hours. I know theres lots of girls and women out there, but I want this one not another. She`s perfect for me, and I don`t mind 1 bit thats she`s 10 years older and already has 3 kids 12,9,and 7. Any advice would be great. I love her and I`d do anything to get her to like me, and to show her how much I love her. But I don`t want to ruin our friend ship and get her to hate me. Do you think I still have any chance? Like a month ago before she even met this new guy she even told me it`s possible we could wind up getting married. I don`t know what to do. Any help would be great as soon as possible. Thanks Advice
Wonder what kind of woman would be talking of marriage with you a month ago and then a week ago she is sleeping with another guy and planning to move in with him (with her 3 kids?)

You can try to keep in contact with her and remain her best friend. That's your best hope for getting her back in your life.

But, my advice is to thank your lucky starts that she is gone and you can return to your high school life and meet some real girls (not a phantom online woman) Do yourself a favor and forget her!

Good luck!

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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