Lack of trust ruins relationship
Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Female
Just one week ago, my boyfriend of 3 years decided it was over between us. He moved back to Chicago where he is originally from.( I am in california). Anyways, our relationship was very rocky due to my constant insecurities. I always told him I didnt trust him andalways thought he going to meet someone else and fall for her or think she was prettier than me. Anyways, I basically pushed him away. He was very patient with me and he never gave me a reason to mis-trust him, yet past occurances in my life have made me non- trusting of people. He is a great guy and I love him with all that I have. I want him back so bad. Just him being gone has made me evaluate my behavior and I want to change and give it another shot, probelm is I have told him I was going to curb my jealousy before and I never have. I always meant to but I guess I just always assumed he would stick around so I didnt make enough effort I guess. Losing him has made me see everything in a different light. If he took me back I know it would work this time. Now that we are 2,500 miles away, how do I prove to him that I will change and make him see that we are good for eachother? I would be willing to move ou there for him, I just need to know if it's too soon to push the issue and if I do push it, how should I go about it?
Lack of trust can easily destroy a relationship.
Trust is one of the basic elements of a good relationship. It is very difficult to think of a way for you to build up the trust and then convince him of it long-distance.
About the only shot you have is to move to Chicago (make sure he will see you when you are there) and prove to him you have lost the jealousy/trust problem.
For advice on how to beat the trust problem see our web page which is at: http://www.romanceclass.com/miscr/LoveCat/23682
Best of luck to you!
-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com