I love him so much, and I know he loves me, and I think that is worth fighting for
Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Female
My boyfriend and I were dating for a period of two years and we broke up about three months ago. The breakup was mutual,because we were getting into alot of arguments. I, however,thought that we were on a "break" (meaning that we were going to eventually get back together). After about a month, I asked him what exactly this breakup meant, and he said he needed "more than a few months" and that him and I wernet compatible, and that there was nothing left to build in the relationship. At the same time, he told me that he loved me with depths of his heart (these were his actual words) and that he is my friend for life. I love him with all my heart and I miss him terribly, and I really didn't want the breakup to occur in the first place. After some self reflection though, I realized that this break was a good thing, because I have to work on myself because I realized I am depressed and have a low self-esteem, so I am seeing a therapist and want to change the way I cope with things. I still, however, want this to be a "break", not a break-up, and so I already cried in front of him about a month after we broke up, asking him to give it another chance and he didnt want to.
We are still friends, however, and hang out about maybe once or twice a month. The last time we hung out together, I told him in a very calm and rational manner that I realized the mistakes that I made, and that I was sorry for all the things that happened, and I really, truely was. I mentioned to him that in the future, I hope that hell reconsider our relationship because people can change and there is always something else in life to build on.
My question to you is, where do I go from here?
I havent really told him that I want him back, but I really do want to continue our relationship, just to take it a lot slower for now. I dont want to pressure him more than I already have, but I love him so much, and I know he loves me, and I think that is worth fighting for.
What should I do?
You are doing all the right things already: you are in touch with him and let him know how you feel (without pressuring him.)
And, you are seeing a therapist. Work very closely with your therapist as he/she knows far more than I do about you and your relatiionship.
I hope everything turns out well for you!
-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com