Tell him to make up his mind
Visitor's Question from a 16-20 year old Female
okay..me and this guy went out in august.. but he had this gf for 2 years..so he had sex with her when we went out, and we broke up. But after that..it was still like we were together becauase he told me he still loved me and we kissed and stuff and it was like we were still together. But him and his gf were stil together. i never saw her or anything. Me and him stopped talking for a while because we got in this argument. But he goes to my school and he apologized and told me he missed me and all the stuff. Anyway, ever since, hes been walking me to my classes and we hold hands and stuff but were supposed to be "just friends" so i dont know if he really still loves me, but i still love him. I talked to him on the phone, and me and him are supposed to hang out just me and him..he made jokes like "were gonna have sex in the shower" and like flirty comments like that. and i asked him why he is still together with his gf if hes so unhappy because hes always complaining about her. He replied "maybe because im afraid to be alone" but he knows im here, and i get the feeling he still loves me because he always kisses my cheek and like hugs me and constantly wants to be around me. So how can i get him to tell me how he feels? should i express my love for him? i really want to be with him. help!!
You are in a bad situation and you need to tell him to make up his mind. Either he is going to be with her or with you but not both. You will be taking the risk that he will choose her. Would you be able to deal with that? If not, then what else can you do but keep things the way they are and try to get him to understand that you are uncomfortable with him having a girlfriend.
He can't really love you if he is still having sex with her. Not unless you let him get away with it.
So, my advice is to ask him to make up his mind.
-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com