Talk with her honestly
Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Male
I have been with my girlfriend for 3 years and engaged for the last year and 3 months. We had a bad break-up right after thanksgiving '04 and lasted till first of the year. There was a girl involved but only friends and she finally realized that but still throws it in my face. We were working it out and i caught her going into a hotel a 4 in the morning with a girlfriend of heres and 2 guys. She said she went in long enough to use the rest room. We argued for a week and all in one day she came back and acted like nothing was wrong and weve been together ever since. Went from totally cold to hot in 24 hours. I have found phone numbers on her cell phone that are guys and she still talks to them and she also has a profile on a dating service online and still uses it. I have access to both her email accounts and her phone bill and the profile on the dating service. It was wrote down on a paper that i seen at our house. We plan to get married in june and i have recently paid for everything and she pushes for the wedding but at the same time i know all this stuff and still find new stuff on the stuff i have access to. I don't ever tell her the things i know but it's building up and desrtoying me inside. I catch her in lies but don't say anything cause i'm afraid we will argue and she will leave and that's pathetic. There is so much more to this story but you said be brief. I strongly feel she sleep with some and thats why she came back so fast and strong from guilt. What do you think?
You would be better off postponing the wedding until you two learn to trust each other and talk about things openly and honestly with a minimum of fighting. Your suspicions sound right to me. So tell her how you feel and that you can't get married under the current situation. If she really cares about you, she will be willing to discuss whatever is bothering you. And if you have skeletons in your closet, let them out now rather than listening to them rattling around.
-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com