Boyfriend's son interfering with relationship
Visitor's Question from a 41-50 year old Female
My boyfriend have been seeing each other for four years. Unfortunately I have only met his son. My boyfriend met my only sister. I am not part of his son's life. We both hit it off his son and I he is only 16 yrs. My boyfriend has not told his son about us and he does not make me a part of his son's life because my boyfriend has alot of trouble with his son regarding school and social life he does not listen to his father and following his instructions. I take it this is related to my boyfriend and his ex's divorce four years ago. My boyfriend was alway divorced when I met him and he and I worked together is the same office. He asked me out first. After three months he said he loved me. We were friends for six months. Took breaks and lunch together to get acquainted and then he surprised me one day and asked me out. He says he is not ready for marriage but has it in his mind I am the one he would marry. Yet he says I cannot promise anything because he doesn't know how to handle telling his son about us. He always tells me he loves me and always remember that. He says he belongs to me and no one else. I did tell him I am thinking of us in the future and if he isn't with me on that to tell me but to this day he never said no he is not with me on marrying someday. He tells me he appreciated me being patient about his situation and he will give me eventually what I want. What do you think about this? Puzzled
One thing you should do is ask him at what age will he tell his son. If it is 18 and you are willing to wait there you go. If it is 21 or vague, you are going to have to make up your mind whether it is worth the wait. My guess is that he is using his son to avoid making a real commitment.
-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com