He's Really Grumpy, Is He Cheating?
Visitor's Question from a 13-15 year old Female
Me and my boyfriend have been peachy keen for about 3 months but all of a sudden he is getting mad at me for every little thing i do! I tell him sorry even when i don't know what i'm sorry for. Is he cheating on me or just doesn't want me
Actually, not to oversimplify or anything, but most of the time if someone is cheating they end up being extra nice to you, because they feel guilty about cheating on you and because they're feeling happy about the extra attention they're getting.
If he's getting grumpy, it could easily be something else in his life is going badly. Maybe his parents or work or school or whatever is really stressing him out a lot and he's taking it out on you. Or maybe now that you've been together for a while the 'new love' rush is starting to fade, as it always does, and he's having trouble adjusting to the 'normal' level of feelings between you two.
You definitely need to talk to him. No matter WHY he's feeling grumpy, you are NOT there to be his punching bag. This is like Lesson #1 in relationships. You have to treat each other well *even if* you are feeling grumpy about other things. If you get into the habit of lashing out at your partner, it never goes away, it gets worse, and then you break up.
So help him to fix it now while it's just getting started. We all get grumpy. It's part of life. But part of the responsibility of being in a relationship is taking that responsibility of treating your partner with care. And that means learning to be mature and controlling your temper. It's a very, very important lesson for him to learn.
If he yells at you again, walk away. And when he's calmer, go back to him and tell him that it is NOT appropriate for him to vent on you. You are there to support him. If something is bothering him, you are there to talk about it and help out in any way you can. But it is NOT right for him to use you to vent at because *he* is having issues in his life.
-- from Jenn
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com