What size lie?
Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Female
Lying about seeing his Ex who he was once "in love with."
His two childhood male friends were in town. They went out and I stayed in. Apparently they met up with my boyfriend's ex. This is the ex who he was once in love with and did sleep with and dated for over 3 years in highschool and college, and who has recently called him and invited him to lunch (he told me afterward). she is "new to the city," and "has no friends here" and is "feeling lonely" so my boyfriend says he should be nice and besides, he likes her as a person (but nothing more). so i said, ok, ok. and i said jokingly with all seriousness, "but if it's gets to more than meeting up once every two months, i think that you should to tell me."
well, he didn't tell me he saw her again, drunk, with his two male buddies who also know her from highschool. this is about one week later, and after the talk we had when i said, "i prefer if you weren't the one to ease her new city loneliness."
as for the drunk night out, i have no idea what went on, and i don't think anything improper went on, but i do know this: he lied to me about seeing her.
i pieced this together because i asked him about the evening, if they tried to meet up with other highschool friends in the city, and he said "no." but then, a friend of both of ours who saw him out told me, not knowing i didn't know, that my boyfriend, his highschool friend vistors, and his ex were out at the bar the other night.
honestly i did not even think of this possibility (i was imagining them meeting up with other guy highschool friends). but then there it was lingering in the air and when i realized what it meant--that he lied to me--i felt like i was choking on air.
my question is this: is the lie he told a big lie or a little lie? is it a white lie or a big bad wolf lie?
sorry so long.
It sounds like a small to middle size lie to me. Something you should worry about and complain about, but not something worth worrying a lot about.
You were wise to ask him not to be the "new person in town helper."
Best luck to you,
-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com