When will she be ready to go out?
Visitor's Question from a 13-15 year old Male
I am 16, and there is a girl That I love to spend my time with. We know we like each other, we talk about it quite regularaly, its kind of wierd but were at a comfort level that Im happy with. Anyway we met back in jr high and have been pretty good freinds since. I never really started liking her since this past summer When we started having big long conversations for hours and hanging out more often. A few days before the end of summer I asked her out on a date. She said she wanted to but she also wanted to stay friends for the time being because she wanted some time to think about it first. The explaination she gave me is that she wants to make sure she is ready for a relationship, her main concern is we go to different high-schools so if we did get into a relationship it would be tough. I compleatly understand her need for time to think and I try to the best of my abilitys to respect her need for space, the only problem is Im almost certain that she wont tell me out right that shes ready or anything like that. I know eventually she will give me the "signs" when she is ready and all that but my main concern is that I may misunderstand her intentions and ask her out when she still isnt ready, and I dont want to hurt her feelings by makeing her say no again. so I guess my question is how do I ask her out without hurting her feelings if the answer is she still isnt ready? Its like I want to be close to her but in an unthreatening way, almost like I want her to know Im there for her but if shes not ready yet thats perfectly ok.
Since you and she have such a wonderful gift of communication with each other, you shsould feel comfortable asking her how she feels. So, instead of asking her out and risking making her uncomfortable, instead ask her casually whether she had done any further thinking about the idea and what was her current feeling.
I wish you good luck,
-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com