Am I crazy?
Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Male
I wrote to you a couple of months ago."She says no but she's acting all strange". Since then my girlfriend said we needed a break and broke up with me although she still says nothing happened with her ex. We were on a break although still living together with our baby for about a month. During that time she spent all her time with a bunch of guys who live next to her sister, going out all to parties in the woods. She also contacted one of her ex's who she hadn't seen in 2 years and started hanging out with him secretly until I found out. She spent every night with this group of guys and when I would call her cell she would say she was with them and would see me when,if she came home. Then she asked me back out a couple days before our daughters 1 year birthday party. She tells me she misses being with me and nothing happened with any guys. I took her back and we have been happier but then after only a week her ex that she had contacted left a message on her phone that said "I don't know if you don't like me anymore but I would like to talk to you please call me." She got real nervous when I played it for her and even lied about what the message said. She said I heard it wrong. Then she admitted I heard it right and she doesn't know why he left that message, probably because she stopped calling him when we got back together but again nothing happened. This is leading to more of the same old problems and now she is back, after only 1 week, going out all night with this group of guys, one of which she gets on the back of his quad in the woods when they go out all night and he calls her everyday and when I am at work picks her up at our house and brings her to his. She said there is nothing going on but when I told her I don't think this is right she said she won't give him up for me. She said I love you and you should trust me to be in teh woods all night with this guy. I can't handle this anymore I don't want to throw away 4 years but what and I crazy her like she says I am???
No, I don't think you are crazy for objecting to her behavior. She is taking advantage of you and she knows it. You are caught between a rock and a hard place. My recommendation is to set some limits that you feel ok with and tell her that she needs to honor your feelings. You have been allowing her to hurt you long enough. That's my opinion. You, however, have been putting up with her behavior for a while and perhaps you would prefer to keep her with all her bad characteristics.
Best of luck,
-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com