Making a date

Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Male
I have heard time and time again from many people how they hate being asked "Would you like to go out with me some time?". Aparently they preffer if they are asked to a particular event or place etc. The trouble with this is that the recipient of the question can get confused and think it is only as friends, but the person asking meant as a date. Maybe there is some info already on your site about this. I did have a look but I eventually suffered from a small case of information over load. Could you point me towards some advice on this? I guess what I'm asking is: How do you ask someone out without using the phrase "Would you like to go out with me" etc, but make sure that you mean as a date? Advice
My sense is that you are trying to make too much of a distinction between going out as friends and going out as a date. Try not to make such a distinction, especiallly to the individual you are asking. It might make them shy away from you. Keep it casual, ask them out for something specific like a movie followed by dinner. Dating is more how you treat the other person than a specific activity with the name "date" attached.

If things go very well, make a casual comment at the end of the evening to the effect that you really enjoyed "our date."

Best Wishes,

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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