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Let your love be like the misty rains, coming softly, but flooding the river. --Malagasy Proverb

It has driven me up the wall trying to figure out what was happening.

Visitor's Question from a 13-15 year old Female
I've just finished a year of high school and I've had this situation bearing on my shoulders day and night. It all started at the beginning of the year when my friend crushed hard on this guy, call him Jake. I didn't think much of him until one day at a football game I noticed him staring at me,then he gave me a shy, happy and apprehensive smile. I don't know what happened but I started blushing furiously and the rest of the night he kept catching my eye. Well, as time went on some of my friends noticed his attention was always directed towards me-he was always looking at me, he was always around and once when I asked him for homework he blushed furiously, mumbled something then walked in the other direction. Time progressed and these things kept happening, but he never really approached me or talked to me and I did not know how to make the first move. Time went on and suddenly it turned into this blown-out situation between him and a few of his friends and me with a few of my closest friends. Everywhere I went I started to feel completely paranoid because he was always looking or one of his friends started looking then kind of whispering or mumbling to the person next to them. I decided to ignore it, but it got worse and suddenly people were saying that I stalked "Jake" and I spent all my time talking about him and prank calling him, but they were the ones doing it! It drove me nuts, till finally he asked another girl out and things smoothed over for a few weeks then it started up again (but he was still going out with the other girl) and it seemed that when I was around he looked the other way or gave me a condescending look and sometimes stared at me till I noticed and gave me a smile. It has driven me up the wall trying to figure out what was happening. He seemed to always be a different person depending on the day. It's summer now and it's still bugging me so maybe you could help me out. Thanks.

RomanceClass.com Advice
Guys are weird, weird people. I'd suggest getting up the nerve and going to talk with him. Say, "all my friends think you have a crush on me. Well, I kinda like you and thought maybe we could go out for a movie sometime".

If you can't go talk with him, then ask his friends what's going on. They'll give you some semblance of the truth, but they will also pass along to him that you were asking about him, which may give him the courage to respond to you directly.

If you can, don't spend your time worrying about what is going on with him. You'll never be able to figure it out on your own and will only spend lots of time absorbed with him when you could be out swimming or playing or whatever.

Good luck!

-- from Jenn
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com

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