The man she was with has a wife and two kids

Visitor's Question from a 31-40 year old Male
I broke up with a girl because I had not disposed of feelings for a previous girlfriend. Those previous girl issues were resolved over several months.

When they were resolved, I was able to look at my more recent relationship in a positive light. We bumped into one and other out one night and I fell in love with her the way I never could have before.

She has kept me at arms length for three months, only seeing me occasionally on the weekends. We have talks and she tells me how much she loves me and how she sees us as a family.

She told me this past Sunday night after planning to stay with me...suddenly, that she had to go. We had a short intimate talk about our love for each other, and she said she had to go because she felt guilty about being with me and leaving her family in the dark about our current situation. I figured OK..she just needs to be honest with her family and then we'll be OK. She repeatedly told me that there was absolutely no one else. It was not about another.

Well last night at about 9:30pm, as I pulled up to the grocery store, I saw her walking to her car with her boss. I obviously stopped because I could not believe what I was seeing. As he opened her door, they embrassed and then kissed...rather passionately. I was shocked to say the least. I pulled my car next to them and the look on her face was of disbelief. I kept my cool and told her I did not appreciate all the lies and could not believe she would do that to me.

The man she was with has a wife and two kids, and has previously cheated on his wife with other females in his staff. She used to talk about how bad he was and what a jerk he she's the one with him, and I'm hurt more than I have ever been.

My heart and head think they know what to do, but it sure would be nice to hear some elses opinion.

Thank you so much. Advice
The answer is to dump her. Walk away from this pretty horrible situation and find someone new who you can love and trust and have that love and trust returned. This woman you were with played you and is playing with fire with her married boyfriend. This is not a situation you want any part in.

I wish there were a better solution for this, but there is no way that this woman of yours is going to have any value in a relationship with you. Let her stay with that cheating husband, they seem to be made for one another.

I wish you the best.

-- from Jenn
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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