I guess I kinda cheated on him about 7 months ago.
Visitor's Question from a 13-15 year old Female
I'll be goin out with my boyfriend for 9 months, in 2 days. I guess I kinda cheated on him about 7 months ago. Its hard to explain. I dont call it "cheating". There was this guy who wanted to experiment sexually with me. Just for "practice". He kept bugging me about it. I didnt want to do anything with him because I knew I had a boyfriend. But it just got soo annoying I gave in and let him have his "practice". All the while, I was thinking to myself..."why am I doing this?" I didnt enjoy it. All this happening was on me and my boyfriend's 2 months.
But anyways... my boyfriend found out not too long after it happened. He knew what I did, he just never mentioned it. He hates hearing stuff from other people. He'd rather just hear it straite up from me. But I was scared to tell him. I was scared he'd break up with me er somethin.
But he got home last night and called me. (He was a lil drunk at the time ~ but still knew what was goin on) But he mentions this whole "cheating" thing again. I eventually just crack down and tell him the truth. He starts blowin up at me. No physically.
But anyways... Im sooo scared Im gonna lose him. What can I do to tell him that it wont ever happen again? What can I tell him to trust me again? This guy is my world. He's been the greatest to me. He's perfect. What do I do?
I dont understand why he got soo upset. It was 7 months ago. I cant take anything back (although, I wish I could). How can I tell him Im sorry? I cant lose him. Can you give me some adivice? Thanks
People get upset when they find out that the one they love has broken the trust that's supposed to be between them. It doesn't matter what happened, but the mere fact that you went ahead with someone else is enough to tear apart the faith your boyfriend had in you. Particularly in this case where he knew months ago and only now you're fessing up to it. So he knows you've been holding out on him and lying by ommission this whole time. That's a serious breach in his trust in you. How can he trust you to tell him about the next time, and how does he know there won't be a next time?
Now, what's done is done, and you're right that you can't change it. You're going to have to earn his trust again by being faithful and honest about absolutely everything. You've got to apologize up and down left and right. You've got to apologize and cry and apologize some more. Ask his forgiveness. Ask him to write into this board for advice on what to do. Ask him to forgive you.
Am I being clear enough? You are going to have a hard road ahead of you. All you can hope is that his love for you will outweigh the betrayal he feels.
I wish the best for you.
-- from Jenn
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com