I don't want to lose it to something as stupid as jealousy.
Visitor's Question from a 13-15 year old Female
Hi.My boyfriend and I have been togetehr for 6months and its hit a rough spot.I have heard that the first year of a relationship can be the hardest.See,my boyfriend ahs a past of being on the internet alot,talking or even cybering with"internet girlfriends" alot and looking at porn.Spending hours upon hours on the internet.and I am EXTREMELY jealouse of the internet.He has cut don on internet hours as a matter a fact he maybe signs on once a week if even taht BUT when he does mention getting online I cringe at the thought of him getting on tehre looking at porn and talking to past women.I know its wrong to beat him up about his past but soemtimes I just cnat stop myself form making stupid coments.Example:So you gonna talk to those chicks?What kind of porn you gonna look at?Are you gonna turn on your messenger so I can reach you on there too?.So needless to say I am jealouse fo the internet and its driving him crazy cause my jealousyover the internet is widening into his jealousy of his love for videogames,or is he watching late night porn shos on HBO even though eh tells me hes not.I even get mad when he stays up late cause he maybe watching dirty shows and we end up getting into fights over my stupid comments.I dont know how to stop making them cause when they come out,they come out.And they hit hard.Please help me.I do wnat this relationship to work.I do.So does he.We have even ahd a heart to heart,crying,warming conversation about how he changed his life for me and I am still evry cold to him.So I told him I would seek some sort of help,and I am.So please.Please.Anyone help em save my relationship.I dont wnat to lsoe it to soemthing as stupid as jealousy.Thank you!
Jealousy is just insecurity. You feel unsure of his love for you, and you try to cut out all other things that he might feel love for instead. You have carried this to an extreme, though, wanting to control every aspect of his life. You need to learn to trust him and have faith in him that no matter what he's doing on the side, he will return to you and love only you. Every time you want to make a cutting remark, you have to tell yourself that you have faith in him and that you want the relationship to work so you have to trust him. If you repeat this enough, then you will start to let go of that horrible ugly feeling and instead you'll be reminded of how strong the relationship is.
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-- from Jenn
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com