The problem is that he has trouble getting an erection
Visitor's Question from a 41-50 year old Female
I have been involved with a man now for a couple of years.He is a good person and I love him very much.The problem is that he has trouble getting an erection(He's had this problem for several years now).When we end up in bed and try to have sex,it ends up being a disappointment.When he cannot perform,he gets VERY upset and doesn't want much to do with me for awhile.I've told him that it doesn't matter,but,he's told me that it hurts him when he can't satisfy me.I've told him that him holding me in his arms makes me happy,but,that doesn't seem to be the answer he wants.He has even tried Viagra and it doesn't help.I know this is very frustrasting to him.I do understand in that I know that it is difficult for some men to "get it up"(as he calls it).How can I prove to him that I love him just for him?I know that this isn't his fault,but,I think that he can't accept the fact that he can't have an erection anymore.When we are in bed together,we do a lot of kissing,touching,massaging,etc. and I'm happy with it,but,he always tries to pentrate me and ends up being let down.I love him very much and I want to help him.Thank you
I understand what you're saying. If the doctor says that this is just how he is, then there's not a whole lot you can do. But if his point is that he can't please you, introduce him to toys or to the idea that he can please you with hand or mouth just as well as with his penis. Guys seem to think that only "real sex" is worthwhile, when really we women want to be touched all over. Tell him that yes he can satisfy you, he can be a man, just he has to do it in other ways, some of which are probably -more- satisfying than "real sex".
I wish you the best!
-- from Jenn
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com
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