I have thoughts about spending the rest of my life with this girl
Visitor's Question from a 13-15 year old Male
Ok, I broke up with my girlfriend about four weeks ago, and I can't stop thinking about her. I have thoughts about spending the rest of my life with this girl, and it scares me that she may never come back to me. I've heard all the "there's plenty of fish in the sea" comments from everybody, and I know that they're just trying to support me, but I am positive that this is the girl for me. She says that we are so different, but she doesn't see all the things that we have in common. That's the reason she broke up with me, claiming that she wasn't in love with me like I am with her. I told her that I didn't matter if she was in love with me right now, but to give me just a little longer to make her see the real me that I believe that I never had the chance to show her in just three short months that we dated. She recently got back together with one of my friends, her ex-boyfriend that she dated for a year and a half. While we were dating, she swore that they would never get back together with him, but apparently he went to her and apologized and she forgave him for everything he did. I just don't understand this girl, but I've tried really hard and just can't. I love this girl with all my being and need her so badly. Maybe I fell too fast for her, but I can't bury my intense feelings for her. The memory of her haunts me everyday. Please tell me what I should do.
While I was reading this, my ex-husband IM'd me... I'm in the same boat that you are. He's already moved on, he wanted to chat about when he's going to Finland with his new girl.
It breaks my heart.
There's no way out of feeling this miserable. You just have to tell yourself over and over that it's done, that she doesn't feel the same way and unfortunately you're going to have to close that chapter in your book. There -are- more fish in the sea. There will be someone else that is better suited for you. Go for a girl who actually -does- love you back. This girl didn't see the best qualities in you... you need to find someone that is as amazed with you as you are with her. She's out there, you just need patience to find her.
You can't bury intense feelings. You can only acknowledge them and know that they will fade over time. Just like if you got thwacked in the arm with a fastball. The bruise hurts and continues to hurt, but it does heal. So will your heart.
I wish you the best,
-- from Jenn
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com