she has a strange sexual excited feeling about people's feet

Visitor's Question from a 13-15 year old Female
Dear Romance Class,

I have this friend (we've been friends for a while--like since 9th grade) and she recently told me that she has a strange sexual excited feeling about people's feet. She also said that she likes them to be dirty, which i thought was weird but i didn't say anything b/c i didn't want to hurt her feelings. anyway, lately, since she's told me this, i have noticed that she is always asking me if i want to take off my shoes (and even socks!) when we're in her house or her room. Also, sometimes she "accidentaly" brushes her hair or her hand over my foot when we are sitting on her bed. Also, she asked me if she could give me a hickey on my arm. She says it is only because she wants to see how to give one but I think maybe she is attracted to me. Maybe I am having hallucinations, but i am worried about this because i am a girl too and i am NOT gay. but she seems like she might be because her hair is short and also sometimes she wears men's shorts and boxers to bed. we have been friends for a while (sincelike 9th grade) but i am worried about this because if she wants to do things with me or my feet that i don't want to do, i think that is wrong and makes me feel uncomfortable. i read in your article about hickeys that one should never do something that makes one feel uncomfortable. so that is why i am writing to you, i hope that you will tell me what to do.
ps also one time when we had a sleepover in my poolhouse, she said that she'd really like to go skinnydipping but i said no, because my parents were home but really i didn't want to i just was making up an excuse. Help me i'm scared and nervous. Advice
First off, just because someone has a short haircut and wears men's boxers doesn't make a person gay. So I wouldn't worry on that side of things.

I think you're reading a lot into this that probably isn't there. And, as you point out, if you're uncomfortable with things then you choose not to do them and you're all set. So unless she offers to kiss you on the lips, then I would think that there's nothing more to this than your imagination working overtime.

You can always ask her in a roundabout way, like, "do you think some women are sexy?" but then she will be the one writing in saying, "my best friend thinks women are sexy!" so you might want to be careful how you word it.

Good luck!


-- from Jenn
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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