i developed feelings for him without realizing what had hit me.
Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Female
Hi...i have a problem....i like a good guy friend *university classmate* very much. I dont know how it happened but i developed feelings for him without realizing what had hit me. He always used to flirt with me and i flirted back. For example, he would squeeze into a chair with me or do silly things like pull my hair, try to make me lick his lollypop, or hug me from behind. He talks to me everyday...he even told me that we look good together...But then, one day i found out that he has a girlfriend. I feel so jealous. I have never met the girl but my other friend who is also his friend told me that he is not serious about her. I dont know what to do....i dont want to be the one who causes their break up. And i dont want him to find out that i like him...because if he leaves her for me, then he might leave me for someone else...supposing he did ask me out in the first place...but the problem is that it is getting more and more painful for me to be around him because i have feelings for him...what should i do? And why does he flirt with me if he has a girlfriend?
You seem to have your head on straight about this. You know not to break up his relationship with his girlfriend, you know that his flirting with you seems odd since he does have a girlfriend. And you know that it's frustrating to hang out watching the guy you like who is unavailable to you.
Since you two are friends, you should be able to ask him about his girlfriend without seeming too nosy. Nose around a little to find out if they're really dating or just seeing each other. See if he's willing to go out for ice cream with you or do study sessions... anything to get the two of you together more often. That is the best way to carry things further and see if it's something you both want.
-- from Marc
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com