It's so hard!

Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Male
we`re broken up 6 months and recently got back talking again.She is goin out with some one else now but she said she still loves me! things were horrible b4 we broke up and she says shes scared things will go back to the way they were. I still love her, but she says she wont hurt him by breaking up with him because she`s scared. It hurts seeing her with him, But i dont know what to do. WE`ve both changed a lot since, but is she just trying to have both of us?? im at my emotional wits end and she said she doesnt know what she should do.she wont make up her mind-or cant. what should i say to her? i know she loves me but its so hard between us. It feels like shes leading me on. and when she tells me this stuff and i see her with him it always causes another row. i cant leve it cause she rings me now and again, even when we have a row. i want her back but need advice. thank you for any help you can give me, sincerely, stephen 21. Advice
Well, Stephen, I understand what you're going through, and it's very tough I know. You want things to be perfect with the one you love, but things are so messed up, it feels impossible. It must make you feel miserable.

Unfortunately, I think that you should let her go and find another love to fill your life with. I do believe the two of you love each other, but given that you've said things were always rough between you and are still now on occasion, it's just not a healthy relationship. You both wish that you could have the fantasy perfect relationship but it's just not going to work out.

You will find new people to love, even though you will always love your ex- and will always have the "what if" thoughts. But the truth of the matter is that it didn't work between you and your best bet is probably to move on. As much as it hurts now, it will hurt less over time.

Good luck, and let us know how you're doing!

-- from Marc
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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