My Girlfriend is Partying Drunk
Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Male
Tonight my girlfriend of 4 months went out with her friends from work and got drunk. Now she is going to a female co-worker's house to a party and tells me that she is just going to stay there. When I offered to pick her up when she felt like leaving she said, "it'll probably be late and she has an extra room." It was as if the last thing she wanted to do was see me tonight. It would be fine if I knew who was going to be there because her ex works there. Am I wrong in being concerned and a little angry. It's really not like her. I've always had an issue with drunk girls at parties because I know how things happen. It is just compounded because I love her so much.
Well, I suppose my first suggestion would be to simply go along. Not in an "I want to watch you" but in a "Let's have fun together!" manner. Most girls I know would be thrilled that their boyfriends showed a willingness to go out and dance with them.
But let's say she wants a girl's night out, which is reasonable too. As much as a girl loves her boyfriend, she wants her own time out for fun too. So in that case you were quite sweet to offer to get her, but maybe she wants a sleepover. Those are fun too. In that case, you need to be able to trust her - and she needs not to get drunk. Having fun and dancing should NOT also equal getting drunk. Drunkenness seems something that young 20 year olds love to do because they can - but that older people rarely do because it's silly. Being drunk and losing control only proves you aren't mature enough to handle alcohol wisely. If she loves you and is true to your relationship, she will maintain control over herself. Would it be fair if YOU got drunk, went out with your friends and hung out at a strip club all night, spending all your money on lap dances? I doubt your girlfriend would appreciate that. So for her to go out, get drunk and spend time with other guys is equally inappropriate.
-- from Lisa
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com