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Love has nothing to do with what you are expecting to get - only with what you are expecting to give - which is everything. -- Katharine Hepburn

He Wants Me when I'm Not Chasing Him

Visitor's Question from a 31-40 year old Female
chasing after an ex, calling them all the time. does this push them futher away? when i finally start going on with my life ,my ex of 2 years i love so much ,he starts coming back around,i give in to him and then few weeks same old thing starts happening his attitude changes ,he says he only wants to be friends,that i pushed him away in the beginning and i wont give it a rest by chasing him.

but he gives me all these mixed emotions. what should i do?

RomanceClass.com Advice
It really sounds like he's playing games with you. You were trying to move on with your life and HE is the one who came after YOU. But when you gave in and said "OK we can date again" he pulls back and says "never mind - I changed my mind"??

It sounds like he likes feeling wanted by you. But he doesn't want to do any work. When you actually started leaving him, it upset his sense that he was the center of your world. So he had to prove to himself that he COULD have you if he wanted you. But when you gave in, he didn't feel like putting the effort into the relationship and grew cold again. Undoubtedly if you say "sorry I love someone else, see ya" he'll be after you again, to prove that he could tear you away from another man's arms if he wanted to.

This really isn't the man for you. I know you miss the good times, but a man who can play games like this is really bad news. He's quite capable of all sorts of harm - not only to you, but to your kids if you eventually had some. You deserve a man who will be good and loyal to you and your family. Leave this game-player behind, even if it's rough, and move on to find someone more worthy of your love.

-- from Jenn
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com

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