Helping an Ex Get Over You
Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Female
I have broken up with my boyfriend whom i've been going out with for 4 years. I have tried to let him down easy, but didn't succeed. His heart is broken and he thinks of committing suicide. He begged for me to take him back, but i can't as i don't love him anymore. Is there any way in which i can help him heal again? He is currently staying in Ireland and i'm in S.A, so it makes things even more complicated. To add to it, he doesn't have any friends and he have a low self esteem, so he don't believe he'll find love again and he probably won't if he doesn't let anyone get close to him again.
Breaking up is always hard. Period, the end. So no breakup is easy. He's going through what just about every other man and woman on the planet is going through. Every human has to build that strength to go on, the knowledge that they are worth something. You can't give self worth to another person.
If he's really feeling that low, that without you he is nothing, it might be time for him to see a therapist. In a relationship, both people should be independent, feeling-good-about-themselves people that love being together. If one person is so dependent on another that, without him or her, they feel like trash, that's not good at all. He needs to stand on his own feet, and if he can't do it on his own, therapy might help.
-- from Jenn
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com