My Wife Keeps Lying

Visitor's Question from a 31-40 year old Male
I recently found out that my wife of 7 years doesn't always tell the truth. Just the other night, she told me she and her girlfriends are going to a fashion show for a charity event. I thought nothing of it, not that she needs my approval. Anyway, she went out and called me around 11 to tell me she is having a grand time and that a lot of local celebrities were there. After she hung up I thought, strange, the place she said she was going to is a Jewish Establishment and closes on Friday nights.

A few days passed and I asked her about it, she said she was where she said she was going to be, so I said to her I called the place that you were supposed to be and they told me that no events are staged there on Fridays, as it is the Eve of the Sabbath. She being caught in her lie, then told me she went to a wedding reception instead, so I said, how come I wasn't invited, she said because I don't like the people getting married (I have never met them). I don't know what to think right now. This is the 3rd major lie my wife has told me within the past 8 months. Please advise. I am really so not trusting her. Advice
Relationships are founded on trust. If you can't trust someone, there really isn't any basis to the relationship at all. So you caught your wife in a bald faced lie and she didn't even try to explain why she lied - she just told you another story. That is pretty ridiculous.

I would go to a therapist or minister or someone with her and get a third party person to explain to her that she can't go on lying. This isn't a marriage if she is going to lie to you whenever she wants. Who knows if she is cheating on you - and maybe bringing sexual diseases home to you. If you can't trust her to be honest, that needs to be handled immediately - either by her being told by someone she'll listen to to respect her marriage vows - or for you to find someone to be married to that you can trust.

What if you were seriously hurt, and they couldn't find her because she was off with some other guy instead of where she was "supposed" to be?

-- from Lisa
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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