She Got Bored After 4 Months

Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Male
i'm 21. I've just broke up with my gf after 4 months. It was my first serious relationship, and the first girl that i loved. For the first month, we were very happy together but then the problems started to arise for her. Basically i have been selfish and inconsiderate. I didn't appreciate her friends, i was over possessive, i never gave her any private space. Not only this, but everything became so routine that shes lost her feelings for me. She needed breathing space.

I understand all this, my views of things have changed but for her, its too late. She doesn't want to give me another chance, although she wants to remain as friends, i dont want to lose hope in getting her back and doing things differently. I am very gutted and although i have a clear idea about what i should do now, my mind is still completely mixed up, i have no hope however much i dont want to lose hope and i am really depressed.

Please, i would really appreciate it if you can give me advice and tell me whether i have any chance and what i should do to get her back. Advice
Always talk to a doctor, teacher, etc. if you're depressed. That needs to get taken care of first, by a trained professional.

If she "lost feelings" because things got too routine, then that is a problem on HER side. Relationships ARE about routine. Married people get into long routines. That is what makes the relationship last. If she gets bored so easily that a 4 month relationship is too routine, maybe she's just not ready to be dating yet. It's never your task to be her "trained money" to do tricks for her.

-- from Lisa
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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