Long Distance RomanceVisitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Female
My boyfriend and I started dating during the summer up at a boy scout camp where we both worked during the summer. When the summer came to an end, we decided that we just loved each other too much to break up the relationship even though he lived in Nebraska and I live in Minnesota. The relationship was wonderful, although we didnít get to see each other all that often, just knowing that they were out there made it worth it. We both knew that come January he would be going off to Basic Training in Georgia, so for an entire month before he left, I went down to Nebraska to be with him. Everything was perfect, and the week before he left, he gave me a promise ring and said that he didnít want to lose me when he went away to the Army. I was very flattered, and I wrote him a letter for every day that he was away, and he wrote me back whenever he got the chance. In every letter he ever sent to me, he told me that once he got out of the Army, he was going to marry me. In fact, he talked about it so much, that he had the name of our dog, and children picked out.
So when I went down to his graduation in April and he told me that we needed to be on a break, I was shocked. He said that he just needs to focus on the Army right now, and that heíll probably be sent over to Iraq so he doesnít want me to be so attached to him when and if he leaves. He said that weíll be together again someday and that I just have to have hope, but Iím a bit of a pessimist so Iím failing to have any hope whatsoever. When he was telling me goodbye for the last time, he was still kissing me, and hugging me, and telling me that he loved me, so Iím a little confused.
I donít know what to make of this situation, and more than anything I just want him back, but I know he needs this time apart. So I guess I just want to know what I can do so that in the future when heís out of the Army, I have a shot at getting back together with him.
This is REALLY common. He is worried about dying and he doesn't want you to be hurt. He obviously still cares for you a great deal and is trying to shield you from the pain. It's up to you to prove to him that you'll be there for him and be waiting when he returns. This has happened in every war from WWI to WWI to the Vietnam war and more. There are many books about the wives and girls of army men, you might want to pick a few of them up and learn what is involved here.
-- from Lisa
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com
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