My boyfriend and I get along good but he has a controlling sister that tries to break us up.

Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Female
My boyfriend and I get along good but he has a controlling sister that tries to break us up. She use to do really bad things to me and I would always tell him but he would just brush it off and it would make me even mad at him into one day she did him wrong and he couldn't cover for her anymore. It made us commicate even better we discover she try to turn us aganist each other, so when it didn't work she decide to sit me down and admit that she was trying to destroy us becuase she felt jealous. After that happen I told her I forgive her at least I thought I did but just to know what I felt all the time was right hurt me more because my boyfriend told me that she didn't have a problem with me to make the long stroy short. I have relize that she has issues of her own happniess. I cannot believe she would target her own brother but my question to you is how do I forgive a person that has try to destroy me as a person. when she admitted that to me was she calling out for help or was it because she has another plan to get me you never know with her. her brother love her so much and I never done anything to come between them but now I just shut her out of my life for good because I was trying to say you are not going to treat me like this I been nothing but nice to you. My boyfriend and I have kids together and she has kids too and they notices the attention between us that their aunt should I talk to her about it or remain the same. Advice
Empathy... that's the key word and a big word. Some of us have to be adults and realize grade school is over. Other's can't for those of us who can we have to be empathetic for the other person and realize that they either can't or don't want to deal with their issues. We also know that when they act a certain way that their motivations are caused because of their issues and let it just bounce of us.

In short, moving on is the best way to forgive.

Best wishes,

-- from Marc
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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