I am jealous of a female colleague of my boyfriend.
Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Female
I am jealous of a female colleague of my boyfriend. We have a long distance relationship amd trust is even so more important. He recently went out with two of his colleagues and her for a drink and lied to me that she was not there. Later he forgot what he had told me and mentioned that she had been there. I confronted him and he got angry that I accused him of lying. He then admitted that he knew he was lying. I suggested that I meet her so that I get to know her. We met and she behaved rather agressively towards me. My boyfriend told me that I had provoked her. When she was not around us he claimed that I had scared her away. It seemed to me that how she is feeling is more important to him than how I was feeling and that he was defending her. He said that I should ignore her behaviour. Now, she is around him every day, he enjoys the attention, I can understand this. Moreover she has a boyfriend. But still I wonder how to handle the situation. Please advise. Should I break up with him? I know that I have been jealous and might have driven him to lie, but then he is the only one responsible for his actions and words.
You say you have driven him to lie yet in the same sentence you are saying he is responsible for his words. Does this make sense? You may want to check out the page on jealousy at http://www.romanceclass.com/miscr/LoveCat/23682.
-- from Marc
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com