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We don't love qualities, we love persons; sometimes by reason of their defects as well as of their qualities. --Jacques Maritain



He's Leaving the Country - What Should I Do?



Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Female
I've been dating this guy for an year and now he told me he was thinking to leave the country and to work in foreign country for indefinite time..

... I think I'm seeing in his eyes that he doesn't want to leave me,but he never asked me if I wanted to go with him, even if I was clear enough that I'm not going to say 'no' if he ask. I love the guy ,I would do anything for him ,but I'm not sure if he loves me back ,he never expreess his feelings in words,It's so hard to make him open up...and I don't know if he will appreciate if I decide to go with him anyways.

I don't want to loose him ,but I don't want to make him stay either . Please, give me some advise ..I don't know what to do .




RomanceClass.com Advice
Those situations are ALWAYS tough and they happen all the time. People move away to go to college, to go into the military, to take a new job. There is always the question of what to do about the relationship. Long distance relationships are tough - but it's also very tough to uproot two people that have not agreed to marry each other. Heck, even uprooting MARRIED people is very tough on the relationship.

If you're in a relationship, you should NEVER sit around waiting for someone to ask you something. Relationships are about communication. You should SPEAK UP when something bothers you or you have something to say. If you want to go with him, then say so. It might be a very pleasant thing for him to hear. He can always ask for you guys to do long distance for six months or so while he gets settled, to make sure everything is OK first. But to just not say anything at all makes no sense. You have to tell him how you feel.

I have long distance tips here -

http://www.romanceclass.com/miscr/LoveCat/54711

good luck!

-- from Lisa
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com





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