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Love is, above all, the gift of oneself. --Jean Anouilh

He Flirts with My Friends

Visitor's Question from a 13-15 year old Female
Okay, my boyfriend lives close to one of my best friends. He goes over to her house alot..and i am a jealous person. I know he wont cheat on me, but it still drives me nuts. Then he talks about her alot and even to me and hangs out with her at school quite a bit. Then he also flirts with another one of my best friends and she flirts back..worse than he flirts with her.

This drives me nuts...and i still know that neither of them would do any thing behind my back. I dont know what to do because i like to have him by my side yet i want him to know i trust him and want him to have friends and hang with them.. even if they are my friends also.

RomanceClass.com Advice
It's definitely a good thing that your guy likes your friends and visa versa! The trouble that is caused when those two groups of people do not get along is legendary. So if anything you have a GOOD problem here to deal with.

It's really very healthy for a guy to have girl friends and visa versa. Sometimes the girl feels jealous because the guy hides all his girl friends and only talks to them secretly. So in this case your guy is being VERY open about it, up front and honest! So that's also quite good.

As much as your guy has other friends, though, you should always be the primary "friend" in his life - his BEST friend. You should be the one he spends the most time with, talks with the most, shares the most secrets with. So part of me wonders why he has so much time to hang out with your other friends. Why isn't he hang out with you instead? Why does he go over this other girl's house instead of yours? Isn't there a car or bike or bus or something he could use to get to you - or you could meet him half way? Yes it might take work, but that's the whole point of a relationship. Relationships take work. If he is hardly ever seeing you and instead is spending lots of time with other people - whether they're male, female or canine - that's not right. He should be making that effort to see YOU because you're his girl. And he should be doing that because he WANTS to be with you, not because you told him to.

So it's time to sit down and think about the time expenditure here, and find a way to make it more reasonable as far as time with you is concerned!

-- from Jenn
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com

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