My Best Friend is Dating my Ex
Visitor's Question from a 13-15 year old Female
I still have very strong feelings for my ex. And my best friend is very much aware of the fact. When I found out that my ex was interested in her, I was crushed. Luckily, my best friend assured me she would never date him.
2 weeks later, she is. They've been a couple for close to a month now. What I don't understand is how she could do this to me. We fight all the time now and our friendship is ruined. My trust for her, along with my heart, is shattered. I feel used, betrayed, and lied to. It kills me to see them together. It would hurt to see him with another girl period. But my very own best friend...that's worse. Much worse.
But the situation gets even MORE complicated. My OTHER best friend ALSO has feelings for this guy. So all 3 of us are after him. Unforunately, this other girl has no idea I still like the guy. So she talks about him constantly, her and my ex are even best friends and have been for years, so I don't say a thing because I don't want our friendship to be ruined just like me and my best friend's is, and I also don't want to ruin her and my ex's close relationship...
So what I'm asking is this-Is there anyway out of this love triangle? It's amazing how a guy could get inbetween us all. But somehow, he is. My best friend is blaming this all on me, telling me to get over it and let her be happy. I wish I could. Thank you!
This stuff happens ALL the time. It is quite common. People date other peoples' exs. People date peoples' sisters. It's the way the world works. We tend to date people we know and spend time with.
Don't get too riled up about your friend. As much as you say you wouldn't, you might have done the same thing in her position. You would have fought against the feeling, sure. But if you really really liked him a lot and he kept being friendly to you, you probably would have given in even though you knew you shouldn't. That's the way lust and love work. Remember, he's not an "innocent babe" here. He actively chose to flirt with her and date her.
We all have exs. We all have friends. It's tough, but reconcile with them. Relationships come and go - but friends are friends through it all. Who knows, your ex could end up with someone completely different from you 3 and you could all be laughing about it in a few years. It's how life works out.
-- from Lisa
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com
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Walk away slowly