She's Emailing Strange Guys and Lying
Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Male
My wife and I have been married for almost 6 years. Currently my job has me away from home. I checked my wife's email and found that a couple of guys had emailed her. The emails were innocent but we had said that we were not going to have new friends of the opposite sex unless we agreed upon it. I have had reasons in the past not to trust her (i.e. allowing attention from another).
We had a huge blow out about it. I asked her to have them stop emailing her and she agreed. It seems as though this guy may still be emailing her at work. What do I do? I'm having some serious trust issues here but I don't want to make things worse.
You can never police someone 24 hours a day. If she is thinking it's OK to lie to you, then in essence you can never trust her about anything. I would find a therapist and go together to the therapist, so that a third person can talk with her and get this through to her. Her #1 focus should be you, and she should never lie to you. If she's at the point that she is not fully agreeing with that, then that underlying issue needs to be fixed. Anything else she's doing is just a symptom of that basic lack of respect and focus.
-- from Lisa
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com