My Jealousy Drove Us Apart

Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Male
Well I have been engaged to a wonderful woman for about 2 yrs. We met at work and work together and I moved in with her. We are always around eachother 24/7. She recently ask me to leave she needed time to herself to think.

I am jealous and make her feel I don`t trust her. I have been married 2 times before and both my ex`s cheated on me.

So is this the end to our relationship? I love her more than anyone I have ever loved. How can I put the jealousy to death and prove to her I trust her. Advice
Everybody who is jealous should read this story of yours. It's easy to think jealousy is just a minor thing, but it is like water torture for a relationship. It goes drip - drip - drip and finally it drives the partner insane and they leave. It's really something you have to take care of early on, before the destruction is unfixable.

A related problem here is that you two were together 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. While it's good to care for each other, it's also REALLY important to have other friends and interests too. She should have gone out with her friends occasionally, you with your friends. You both have to remain *people* even while you are a couple.

You really have to show her that you are taking real steps to take care of this jealousy. I would highly recommend going to couples therapy. That way she starts rebuilding the contact with you, building that trust, and seeing that you are really serious about making this work. Actions speak louder than words, and you have to show her that you'll make this work.

-- from Jenn
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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