I'm Trying Not to Be Jealous

Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Female
I want to not be jealous anymore. My boyfriend never gives me any reason to be jealous or to fear that he will cheat on me. He tells me that I'm all that he looks for and wants, and he tells me I'm beautiful but I still am jealous of other girls. They can be strangers, girls that aren't even his friends, but friends of his friends that are hanging out around him, or my own friends, I will become very jealous. This is breaking up our relationship...my jealousy and complaining over everything I see that bothers me is the reason why we're on a break right now.

I know I shouldn't be jealous--I can't back up my jealousy with anything that he has done. Part of me feels that my jealousy is due to my past boyfriend. I was with him for a year and a half and in the beginning, I never once thought that he'd cheat on me. I never had a problem with him going out, I'd never worry. He had told me how much I meant to him and I believed it. But 3 months into our relationship, he cheated on me, and things went downhill..I broke up with him and I had found out from him that he had recently cheated on me again.

Fears of the past becoming the present cloud my mind. I trust my boyfriend, but I still get jealous. I got jealous over him letting a girlfriend of mine borrow something that he didn't let me borrow. I don't know what to do.

How Do I stop being so jealous when there really isn't any reason for me to be jealous???




RomanceClass.com Advice
I know it can be really hard to fight jealousy once you've been cheated on. This is part of why a betrayal of trust is so damaging - its effects can last for years. I have a TON of pages on the site about how to get through jealousy. Read through all the tips and work on it every day. It requires serious effort but it can be overcome.

-- from Lisa
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com




Visitor Submitted Responses
Our RomanceClass visitors have chimed in with thoughts on this question and answer. Click on a link below to read what their solutions are!

Time to chill out
Spy needed
He has you
Boyfriends and girls
Take care of yourself
Jealous
No advice for jealousy
trust them
Try hard
Same problem
User Submitted Response from a 16-20 year old Female

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