He Refuses to Get Married - I Want him Back
Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Female
My boyfriend and I broke up last valentine's day after ten months of being together. In the past almost-year, we broke up, got back together after finding out I was pregnant, miscarried TWICE, I went through three jobs and got fired from the last one. I am currently unemployed, grieving still over my babies, and a complete wreck because my boyfriend says he still, despite everything, cannot imagine being married (he doesn't know whether he has an aversion to being married to me or to anyone at all at this point).
We have been living together for the past six months in his apartment and he's been kind enough to give me as much time as I need to move out. I feel as if all my limbs have been cut off. As if everything that could possibly be taken from me was and now I'm left with absolutely nothing. I want to be able to work things out with him and sort out our own individual problems together. I knew he was the one when I met him and this has not changed.
How can I make him see differently and to, at least, consider giving us another chance?
The most important thing you can ever learn in life is that people are not there to be molded into your personal ideal shape. He does not want to be married! He doesn't want to. It doesn't matter why. He doesn't want to. If you want to be married to someone, you have to find someone else. It is not kosher to hound him and guilt him and harass him until he finally gives in to your wishes.
Yes, you love him. That is fine. You can be his best friend for life. However if you want to MARRY someone, then find someone else. It is completely unfair to pressure this one guy into doing it because it's your pet plan for your life.
-- from Lisa
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com