I Cheated, We Broke Up, Now What?
Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Female
I am having a confusing and hard time getting over my ex who I was in a relationship for two years with. The breakup was my fault, he found out through a mutual friend that I had cheated on him, but he had told him the truth that it wasnt "major" cheating, i had only kissed a guy after going to a bar and was very affected. Well, he took this to the next level and was harrassing me over the phone and saying very hurtful things and calling me all types of names.
My closest friends that I have told what he said tell me I shouldnt be so hung up over this. Actually, I was relieved when we broke up because he hasnt been working and his lifestyle is so irritating and he will not change this and my life is opposite than his.
I recently went over to his apartment to return his things he had given me a( he wanted it all back) and we were together. He then told me he didnt want to be in another relationship with me and that we should still keep in touch and he doesnt know, it kind of seemed like he wanted to still be together. I myself am confused but still very much attached to him. he had even told me to call him that night but i didnt it hurts and i dont know if i should continue this. help!
It's very common for people to feel those tugs when they break up. You have a habit that is hard to just break off. However, it sounds like you really weren't happy with him and that you would be much better suited for someone else. Give yourself time to get through the breakup period, I have a ton of advice on the site about how to get through it. See what else life has to offer you. If in a few months, after giving your head time to clear, you realize you can tolerate all his faults, then it might be worth it to work on it again. But not until then.
-- from Lisa
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com