After 8 Years, The Love has Faded
Visitor's Question from a 31-40 year old Female
I have been married for over 8 years and I'm not happy at all. I think we both have changed so much since the day one of our life together. I don't really know if the love is there anymore. I love him because of our beautiful daughter but I'm not in love with him. I feel quilty for not giving him that love that he wants from me. He says he is in love with me. I just don't know what to do anymore. I'm starting to think I'm the problem in the relationship and I should stay with him even if I'm not happy...just to keep him happy. What should I do.
All relationships go through changes over time. All love changes from hot-and-heavy passionate love into a more mature, calm, deep love. It's the love that has us tuck the blankets around our loved one to keep them warm, the love that has us bring them chicken soup when they are sick. That's the real love that matters, the small day to day touches.
Find small ways each day to renew the connection and demonstrate that love. A relationship doesn't just happen, it takes daily care like a garden. If you really are stumped on this, talk to a therapist or minister or someone. Talk to your husband and tell him you'd like to bring more of a connection back into your lives. He'll probably be quite happy to help, if you come up with some interesting ideas!
-- from Lisa
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com