Building our Friendship First
Visitor's Question from a 13-15 year old Female
I met this guy about 3 months ago. The minute we saw each other things clicked and we got along really well! Things happened between us that for me normally wouldn't happen the first night I met someone, but there was an immediate connection and attraction between both of us.
Everything was great, then I found out about 2 weeks later that my friend (his friend as well) liked him but never said anything. A lot of Drama took place, but him and I still hung out and did stuff. Since I'm still in school Christmas Break happened so we didn't see each other for a month and a half (however we chatted almost every night).
When we got back he and I got together and he lit candles and everything, whole 9 yards. When I realized how much I was falling for him I decided anything physical had to stop before I got really hurt. He agreed that we should work on our friendship since we really don't know much about each other, and he doesn't have 2 seconds in the day and doesn't have time for a Relationship.
I don't want to add any stress in his life. But I really like being with him and the side of me he brings out when we're together. I'm just... I guess confused, I don't know it's just hard..
It's really great that you two are working on the friendship! That layer of communication and honesty is critical if the relationship is going to last. I don't understand why you say he doesn't have 2 seconds in the day, and doesn't have time for a relationship. Obviously he's had time to hang out with you in the past. That is what a relationship is all about - hanging out, spending time together.
Every one of us is busy with the various tasks we have. But every one of us chooses how to spend the 24 hours we have in each day. Heck, this guy isn't even juggling a job, kids, and golfing schedules yet. Many people out there have super busy lives - and they still find time to spend time with their partners. So it might be time for him to look at his schedule and find out why there isn't even 15 minutes a night to spend talking with you on the phone.
-- from Jenn
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com