Am I In Love? I'm 14

Visitor's Question from a 13-15 year old Female
I'm 14 years old, and I think I'm in love with my boyfriend. Actually no, I KNOW I'm in love with my boyfriend. But see before me and my boyfriend started going out I was talking with my best friend and she thinks teenagers can't be "in love". But I think they can cuz well I am.

She thinks me and my boyfriend are dumb or something for saying "I love you".

Teenagers can be in love right? And what should I tell my friend without seeming like I complete idiot? Advice
Being in love really doesn't have to do with age. Teenagers can be in love, people in their 80s can be in love. Being in love has to do with the time you are really with the person you are in love with. You can't be in love after a few weeks. Real love takes months to build up. Because love is not about a "feeling" or a "look". Real love isn't about loving his eyes or loving his laugh. Real love is about knowing ALL about him. It's about knowing what he's like when he's grumpy. It's about knowing what he's like when he's really sad. It's about knowing what he's like when he's happy, and what he's like when he's very frustrated. It's about knowing his really good side - and also knowing him when he's at his worst. It's about ACCEPTING all of this without trying to get him to change. It's about knowing his deepest dreams and helping him achieve them, about trust him with your own dreams and knowing he'll accept them and try to help you get to yours.

So yes, if this is a guy that you've dated for a year and spend your afternoons with every day, you can certainly be in love with him. But if you've just met him and think he's super cool, that's not love. That's the hormones speaking.

-- from Jenn
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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