My Jealousy Drove Him Away
Visitor's Question from a 13-15 year old Female
I was dating this guy for about 3.5 months when he got a job transfer to work in a city two hours away. This meant he would be gone Monday through Thursday every week. I could only talk to him on the phone. Well my female jealously took over the the relationship and I kinda thought he was cheating on me. He got mad and pulled away. I started to think he was cheating on me even more. He stopped saying I think Im falling in love with you and stuff like that. I got really scared. One day when I went over to his house I told him I thought we would be better off friends for now. (His job away from home lasts one year) I could not take putting myself threw such misory.
Well we hung out as just friends after that but one time I went over there and we ended up having sex. We decided that we were going to try to maintain a friends with benefits relationship. I told him that if he found another girl or if I found another guy we would break it off. Well last sat. when I went over there, there was some chick's senior pic on his wall tacked next to a picture of him. Kinda like they were a couple. I got really depressed and upset. I dunno why I can just move on from him. He told me the girl was just some girl he met and he didn't want a girlfriend right now. I dunno if the pic was up to try to make me jealous or if he just is being a guy and doesn't realize that it hurts me to see her picture on his wall.
Im sure that if i asked him to take the picture down he would but I dont want him to see that im jealous over her, since we agreed on the relationship we have right now. I love hanging out with him and I know I should probably stop but it's the fact that I know he is there that i cant get over. The knowing that if the situation was different we could be together is what kills me the most. Im afraid im going to lose him. Oh yeah Im 18 and he is 22.
Thank You for your advice
Any time you say "let's date other people" you are setting up a situation for you both to go and fall and love with and marry other people. That's the whole point of dating. If you don't want him seeing other people, then you better tell him soon - before he gets in too deep with this other person.
-- from Lisa
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com