How To Flirt

Visitor's Question from a 13-15 year old Male
I am 17 year old average pakistani college student living in london where i am surrounded by pretty white girls. well i am silly sometimes, definitely dumb like people say, ugly and stuff like that.

Ive never had a girlfriend in my whole life and the problem is because of my skin colour. I always see black girls and asian girls but on the street but i dont really pay attention to them that much.

i have asked out a girl before. she turned me down because of my skin colour, it kind of hurt but i kind of got over it,it knocked my confedince out a lot, it badly upset me, i really liked her.

I havent actually fallen in love, i know why i like white girls alot is because they're so sexy, other guys must feel the same as me. and i want to say hi and make a conversation but then what happenes if the girl doest like me and what happens if its because of me being 'PAKI'. i dont think i can take that type of rejection. i am very shy with no confidence at all, ive never had luck in finding someone who i want and i dont think that will happen. All my friends, even my white friends have said i have bad taste but i cant really change it.

could i be cursed or something? could there be another way to approch a blonde girl?, a girl at collge i dont know at all. Advice
Everybody has a type they are drawn to. So what if you're drawn to white girls? That shouldn't matter at ALL. Look around the world. White people date black people. Indians date asians. Africans date middle easterns. Who really cares? If you really do meet a girl who says "I won't date you because of your race", that girl needs to go out and get a bit more mature. That attitude went out in the 1950s.

You're not cursed. A ton of people haven't dated by age 17. A ton of people don't start dating until they are 18 or older. You obviously haven't found someone good for you yet. You need to get to be FRIENDS with someone before you start asking them out though! It's no wonder that other girl said no if she didn't even know you first. You tried to go too fast and she told you to slow down. If anything you should have learned from that instead of just giving up!

I have a TON of advice on the site about how to meet people, how to flirt and get to know them. It is here -

so READ it, STUDY it and then start to DO it. This isn't something that a lightning bolt from the sky can "make better". It is ALWAYS about putting the time and effort into learning the skills necessary. So if you want to date a girl, you have to learn how to TALK to a girl and be friendly. That is a skill like any other one. So put in the time and effort to LEARN and PRACTICE that skill.

-- from Jenn
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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