He Broke Up Because We were Friends
Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Female
My boyfriend of two years broke up with me six months ago. He could not give me a reason as to why he was breaking up with me other than "he just didn't feel it anymore and we were just too good of friends".
I have since moved away and am trying to start a new life, however I just can't seem to get him out of my mind. I still can't understand why everything happened. I was just wondering how I could put closure on this relationship and move on with my life.
It sounds like your boyfriend was VERY confused!! Being good friends is EXACTLY what people dream about achieving in a long term relationship! It's what happens to every relationship when it does well over time. Here are the stages of a relationship -
it sounds like your boyfriend had some sort of MTV ideal of the relationship remaining "hot and heavy" for ever and ever. That's not how it works! The relationship starts hot and heavy and then matures into something more long lasting - that is, best friendship and love. You guys got that, and he decided he wanted to move on to find another hot-and-heavy. And undoubtedly he'll never be happy because he'll keep moving on and on and on chasing it. Which means he'll end up alone in the end.
It really sounds like he simply wasn't ready for a real relationship. I know it really hurts to be broken up with, and it can take months to heal. Don't rush yourself, give yourself time to be angry and sad and lonely and everything else. Find things you're happy doing and friends you're happy doing them with. Soon you'll meet a guy who DOES cherish being with you, and who realizes that having a best friend as a lover is just about the best thing you could find in the world.
-- from Jenn
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com