I Need my Girlfriend Back
Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Male
Hi, I was going out with my girlfriend for 8 months and one day i was drunk and turned very violent on her and hit her, she broke up with me straight away and only now we have started talking. Well she has told my dad and my friends that she fancies me but not sure whether she'll get back with me. When I ask her she says "I'm not answering you"
I really love this girl and am worried she will find someone else, if she does I'll go mental as I'm a jealous guy. She currently says she is my best friend and when asked will we get back christmas time she said "I don't know, but if we both agree on it I'm sure we will"
Please help me as I love this girl so much! Now she says to everyone she "doesn't fancy me and just wants to be friends" I really can't handle that I need her as my girlfriend, I really do love her. It seems suicide is the only way out I have tried 3 times now. I can see her fancying other guys and it just really annoys me, I even cry. Please help me, I need this girl back as my love.
The more you obsess about this girl, the more you are going to drive her away. People like to feel "wanted" but they NEVER Like to feel owned or treated like a possession. You are very much, with your jealousy and demands, making her feel like she is an object you want to possess, but that you don't treat very well once you get your hands on it.
Suicide is never the answer - why throw away your chance to be truly happy with her in the future just because of a momentary problem? Is that really how you are going to deal with life with her - abandon her any time things get rough? I would hope not!! You need to take STRONG steps to get yourself more stable so that you are worthy of her love. Obviously she cared for you a lot and perhaps she could again - but YOU need to take the steps to be there for her. That means NOT running away because it's "easy".
So find a teacher or minister or therapist or counsellor to talk to. Yes it'll be hard to do it. But isn't she worth it? Get yourself some assistance and put 100% of your being into working through the issues. That is the only chance you have of showing her you are able to be dependable. It will take effort, but it will be worth it.
-- from Jenn
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com