We had sex after a week, am I a tramp?
Visitor's Question from a 31-40 year old Female
I met someone and we had our first date and then our second date in the same weekend. Both times I was over an hour late, he wasn't mad nothing. We laughed so much my stomach hurt, we even slept in the same bed together and he tried nothing.
He left for out of town for 2 days and called me 3-4 times a day and then for hours at night. He wanted me to come and see him as soon as he got home but I could not. We got off the phone and I told him I was going to be and he drove 30 miles just to tuck me in. On Wenesday we had date which I was 2 hours late for, we went shopping and then to the grocery were we bought food to cook at his house along with 2 bottles of wine. We had an awesome time he lit candles and turned on the radio we laughed and just enjoyed each other. Then we went to sit on the floor by the fireplace. One thing led to another and we where having sex. He said to me I am not having sex with you I am making love to you. And we did so for hours. He also told me he wasn't going to date anyone while he was seeing me and it would be okay if I did. When I asked him if he was being honest he said no, it would be terrible for him. He held me all night and when I got up to leave a 4am he grabbed me and asked me to stay until 5. He walked me to the car in the cold and then I left.
I feel like a tramp right now, I think, "why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free". I really like this guy, and I don't know if the calls and all the attention were part of a game to get me in bed. So what do I do? I am lost.
Jeez, that milk/cow line is from the 50s!! Nowadays women and men share their bodies when they want to, for enjoyment. Women do NOT use sex as a lure to get a guy to marry them!! Talk about a really stupid reason to get married!!
If you enjoyed being with him, then be happy. Don't ever try to use sex as a 'trick' to get a guy to do things. Sex is about two people enjoying each others bodies. A relationship is about two people voluntarily choosing to be with each other. If he cares for you and wants to be with you, and you want to be with him, then cherish that! Work to build your friendship and trust and caring to match your other feelings. You want to make sure that when the passion starts to mellow, that you have that friendship and caring to sustain you.
-- from Jenn
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com
Visitor Submitted Responses
Our RomanceClass visitors have chimed in with thoughts on this question and answer. Click on a link below to read what their solutions are!