Would my parents approve.
Visitor's Question from a 16-20 year old Male
I am a male University student.
I've recently begun using the dating site OkCupid, with the aim of a long-term relationship in mind, and very quickly I've found someone I'm interested in.
I haven't contacted them yet, and I'm trying to figure out if it is wise to do so considering the circimstances.
I am just turning 19, but the girl I'm interested in is 24.
I personally have little problem with this.
I am very mature for my age (the key reason I've had no luck in love so far is due in large part to the maturity gap between me and girls my age, both past & present)and I think we have a chance. Won't know till I try though.
My problem comes with my parents. I have absolutely no idea how they'd react if I told them I was dating a woman 5 years my senior. My folks aren't puritians or anything, but they worry about me over anything that seems even remotely weird or radical.
SO, my questions are:
1) relatively speaking, is the 5 yr age gap radical in any way? (I understand there's a difference between my situation and, say, a 16 & 21 yr old couple)
2) Is there any advice you can give me on how to figure out their feelings without directly confronting them?
3)If all else fails, what's a good way of breaking the news to them?
I'm thinking of taking the plunge and giving it a shot anyway. I nothing comes of it, their none the wiser. If we do hit off, then things get tricky.
I don't want to cause my parents any stress or heartache, not just for their sakes but mine and my ladyfriend.
I don't think the years gap is too great an issue, but then I am at the age where a five year difference is not remarkable in any way.
Pretty much all you can do is tell your parents quite honestly about this. Honesty will suit you better than if they find out later that you were not forthright about the whole thing. Tell them maturely that you feel this is the right choice for you, and tell them why. Accept that they may not like it at first, but this is your decision, as a grown-up, to make. It sounds like they aren't unreasonable. Good luck!
-- from Jill
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com