Getting closer to an older girl

Visitor's Question from a 16-20 year old Male
I am a 20 year old boy that is currently in the second grade of university.
I go to uni everyday by train, just a short 15min train ride. And a couple days a week, there is a girl from my city that takes the train the same time as me and/or same train back home that i feel attracted to. I've been watching her for a couple months now and i believe she is somewhere between 22 and 25 years old and she goes to medschool.

She also has her own car, that she drives from her home to the train station every morning.

She has already noticed i stare at her sometimes, and i've caught her staring back at me. Not that it means anything, but now i know she already knows me as "that guy from the train".

I've been trying to gather courage to try and talk with her, but it's really hard. Not only i am a very shy person but i don't believe she would ever give me any chance to date her. Also i just seem to be incapable of coming up with a reason/excuse to start a conversation with her.

I have never dated a girl this old, therefore i don't know what interests she may have, nor i have much money and though i have a drivers license, i don't have a car. So basically i feel that i don't have anything she can be interested in and that she may see me as too young for her. And since i get to see her every week, i don't want to be embarassed everytime i run into her or pretend i didn't see her.

How can i approach a girl this age? I honestly don't know what to do. Advice
I would approach her in a very friendly, low key way.

Start by smiling at her. If she smiles back, that's a good sign. Move to a seat near her and say something like, "Since we see each other almost every day, I thought I'd come over and say hi for once."

If she says something friendly right back, then you've just gotten the hard part over with. Now the rest is easy - ask her about herself. Ask her about med school - does she like it, what classes is she taking - and be interested in what she has to say. Ask her about her commute. See what she thinks about the latest current events. Tell her about your studies, if she asks about you. Keep it light.

You can try this for a few days and see how that feels. Just remember what she talked about and ask her more about those things. If you decide you do like her, then ask her to go get coffee with you sometime before or after the commute. If you two find you have a lot to talk about, the age difference won't even be an issue. Good luck!

-- from Jill
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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