We Were Perfect - He Left
Visitor's Question from a 16-20 year old Female
I've heard and read that if you want your ex-boyfriend back, first you gotta write him a letter saying that you agree with the break up and you are fine with it. Then you don't bother him and give him space.
So I wrote him a letter and I stopped texting him. Before I did that though we hung twice after a break up and everything was cool. He was even very provocative like he would come up to me really close like he was about to kiss me or like grab my waist like he used to do that when we were dating.
I know he is not into "friends with benefits" and also we've been broken up only for 3 weeks. but anyways, after he got a letter he texted me that he is glad that I had such an amazing time with him for 3 months and he also said "... and I am sorry it didn't work out"
What should I do next? We've been perfect together and suddenly overnight he told me he doesn't love me anymore which i believe is not true and I am pretty sure there still is a chemistry between both of us. What should I do next?
I don't wanna be so obvious that I still like him. I feel like maybe when am around him I should just not talk to him as much as I did even after break up which seemed to be fine. So what should be my next step to try to get him back? Please Help. Thank You
I think one of the most important things here is that you still don't know (or perhaps accept) WHY you broke up. You claim you were perfect together - but obviously that's not true, or you would still be together. *Something* was not perfect. You absolutely need to figure out what that was - because if he thinks it'll just be the same as it was before, he didn't want that the first time and he won't want it now. You need to figure out what was broken enough for him to want to call it quits, and work on fixing it if possible.
Give serious thought to all your times together. What were the things that bothered him? When was he not happy? Ask family and friends. Tell them that you want to learn from your mistakes and become a better person - that might give them incentive to tell you the truth. Then once you figure those things out, put serious effort into polishing your skills. We all have things we can improve on in life. Maybe we learn to complain less, or to criticize less. Maybe we learn to be more tolerant or patient. These are all good skills to learn!
Also, find ways to be happy and love life. Dive into hobbies. Go out with friends. Guys are drawn to happy girls. You have to show him you are having a blast, and make him want to be with that happy, fun girl that he sees.
If you combine that joy for life with having made improvements in the areas he cares about, then he could easily be willing to give it another try.
-- from Lisa
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com