First Relationship

Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Female
I am 21 years old and I have been dating my first boyfriend for about a month. We've known each other for nearly three years now and I've had feelings for him for quite a while, and apparently so has he. He asked me out just recently.

My concern is that, even though I'm 21 (he is 24), go to college, hold a steady job, have bills and such, I've never been in a relationship before. He's in the Army, and right now is stationed overseas. We video chat almost on a daily basis, and he is going to try and get leave to visit me for Christmas. When he comes, he will meet my mom and the rest of my family. I can't wait, I'm so excited for him to be here so we can be "real" boyfriend and girlfriend.

I'm afraid that my "inexperience" with relationships (both in general and intimately) may prove to be a problem. I love him dearly, and he loves me. He's patient with me, but I'm not his first.

Even a little advice would be appreciated :) Advice
Absolutely do NOT be worried at all about being inexperienced. It may be a stereotype - but it's true for many guys. They love the idea of having an inexperienced girl that is all theirs. Think of the power of virginity in so many historical situations. The guy wants to be guaranteed that the girl is inexperienced. That is a very desirable thing.

So the more inexperienced you are, the better, for most guys. This isn't a bad thing. This is a very good thing. He'll like the idea of gently correcting your mistakes and gently teaching you new things.

He probably considers himself extremely fortunate that he found you in your innocent state.

-- from Lisa
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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