I Claim I Love Her but I Don't Show It

Visitor's Question from a 16-20 year old Male
i am 18 and the girl i have been with for three years wants us to break up. the reason behind it is dumb as hell. now i am fighting it because she and i are the two most stubbornest people on this planet. part the reason why i love her.

she wants us to break up. It began when I was in South Carolina for a wedding. She asked when I was coming home. I gave her a date but said also that I thought I had a family reunion to attend too. I told her I might not go to it. She got upset and took it as me putting my family first. She does not like my parents because she and i lost a baby and blames my parents.

We had been planning for a year to move in together. Our plan was to move in as soon as I got back home from my trip. But she was upset that I did not immediately come home to her.

so for the last 24 hours i have been arguing and not backing down because i never do. so she has been saying that my parents have too much control over me that i put them first. yet i know and she has even said that she wants us together. but she honestly believes that my parents will never let go and control me my whole life.

she and i have been thru hell for our ages and how long we have been together. her mom going thru divorce, abusive father, losing their house, family dying the pregnancy, the sickness, my surgery, being separated for months at a time. people threatening to kill us. she and i have been thru it all.

i know i have made mistakes and lied but she and i have moved past that and I gained her trust back. i have stolen cars to go see her, proposed, planned on going to college together, and starting a family. we are high school sweethearts who lost touch for ten years and we have loved each other for ten years before we went out. we have known we would marry one another and she believes we are soulmates, two halves of the same soul from a past life. we are the best of friends, tell one another everything; we honestly complete one another as corny as that sounds.

but my question is if i lose this fight, which i most likely will, how would i get her back. i love her and will do anything to be with her and vise versa. but if we break up how do i get her back she is the love of my life i cant lose her and i want her as my wife and i know she wants to be married. hope u can help

confused and lost fiance

RomanceClass.com Advice
OK, this is confusing. You adore her. You would do "ANYTHING" to be with her - but you refuse to stop fighting? How does that make any sense? If you would do anything to be with her, then it's time to put that into action. Words are meaningless. It's easy to say all sorts of things like "I love her" and "I would do anything to be with her". Those mean nothing at all. What matters is what you DO and what you are doing right now is being selfish. You are fighting just to prove you are right. Is that really what is important to you? Is being right more important than being with her?

If so, then congratulations, because it sounds like you might just get that!

-- from Lisa
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com

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